Richard Gadd Says Portraying Himself in “Baby Reindeer ”Was the 'Right Artistic Choice,' But 'It Was Hard'

"There was something interesting about casting myself as Donny and putting myself in the show," Gadd explained

Richard Gadd is explaining why he chose to play himself in Baby Reindeer.

In a recent interview with The Hollywood Reporter, Gadd opened up about the 11-time Emmy nominated show. Speaking about why he didn’t choose another actor to portray him, Gadd said he felt taking it on himself would be more powerful for the audience.

“I would never cast myself just because I wanted to do it as an actor,” he clarified. “I would always ask myself if I thought I could bring something to it that was interesting, that elevated the piece. And I thought, because I’ve been through so much of the things in Baby Reindeer, and because it came from a place of truth, that there was something interesting about casting myself as Donny and putting myself in the show. And I think it was.”

He continued: “It generated a lot of conversation. A lot of people would watch the show and be like, ‘Oh, my God, it’s the person that it actually happened to,’ and I think that blew people’s minds a bit.”

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Looking back, he said he is glad he made that decision, even though going through the motions of his past trauma — relating to sexual abuse and stalking — all over again was difficult.

“I think it was the right artistic choice, but it was hard,” he said. “Nobody wants to revisit a really challenging period in their life.”

For as long as he could remember, Gadd revealed he hoped to “write and be in my own show.” When Baby Reindeer came to be, he confessed that he felt he had been preparing for it for a long time.

“Every production is a very difficult thing,” he explained. “It’s a hard thing to manage, but I felt very ready for it when it came. I’d been writing television for years — I’d come close before on projects but never quite got them over the line — and it just had to be the way I wanted it and I had to go about that with conviction.”

“I’d like to think I went about it with confidence,” he later added. “It didn’t faze me having a lot of power suddenly on my project. That was good for me because I had to have that kind of control to go through this process.”

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Gadd said while his dream was coming true, the filming process of Baby Reindeer was stressful, reiterating the “challenging” reenactments and feeling “the intensity of it all.” Once the show was released on Netflix, he said the stress continued.

“In terms of the fame stuff, that’s been quite difficult because I’m not sure what people expected,” he shared. “I always thought Baby Reindeer would do well. I think some people thought it would disappear without a trace, other people thought it would do all right, other people thought it would be an artistic success.”

He concluded: “I think nobody thought that it would be the stratospheric, Emmy-nominated success that it became. And it was overnight.”

Still, Gadd said he is grateful for the success of the limited series, calling the Emmy recognition “wonderful.”

“I’m very grateful and aware that it’s quite rare to garner everyone’s attention at once as the show seemed to do. It’s just been so intense,” he said. “Something can be wonderful, but you also need a slight break from it. I think that’s maybe where I’m at.”

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Baby Reindeer is now streaming on Netflix.

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